The first entry from home and last entry of my great adventure

So how did this happen? Seems like I was just kicking myself for purchasing a used RV for a trip that had not yet materialized and here I am back at home again. In the intervening 4 months my son has graduated college, moved to Tulsa, OK, and become the teacher he has dreamed of since 7th grade...with a few bumps along the road. I have driven close to 4000 miles, from OR to WA to OK to NM and back to OR. I have fulfilled a life long dream to return to the Navajo Nation and provide health care on the reservation. I have lost a chicken and gained a cat. Yes, that makes 7. And now, here I sit, on the deck, with a glass of wine, a cat next to me and another trying to get in my lap, as if nothing ever happened.

Jonny is having a pretty rough start. Let's see, what has TFA done to help him? Well, he spent the summer teaching first grade and is now on his own with 250 9th graders. He signed on to teach 4th grade bilingual students, then was told he would be teaching MS social studies, then 9th grade OK history. And he is really teaching US Govt and Politics. But he is doing it Jonny style. Gets frustrated,  questions why he is there, but gets up every morning, puts on his teacher clothes and hits it again. He has recruited almost a full lineup for the baseball team he will be coaching. And it sounds like he is making friends and has some good support systems. But he is in Tulsa, OK. Which is a very far distance from Eugene. Today I changed our message machine to leave him out. That was hard.

I am having some difficulty getting used to the Eugene scene again. I am surprised. All I could think about when I was in NM was how much nicer it was in the Pacific NW. And I arrive to arid conditions and temps much higher that Gallup had all summer. And the noise. White folk are so loud. Everyone wants to announce to everyone else just how great whatever they are doing is. Facebook on steroids. And the smells. What is it that makes white kids with dreads think that body odor and lack of hygiene is so wonderful and natural? I just spent the summer with folks whose ancestors were here a long time ago, many of whom do not have indoor plumbing or running water, but they bathe regularly and don't take pride in showing off. I guess I didn't really get it till I got home. And went to Saturday Market. That was probably not the best thing to do this early. I went to 3 powwows while I was in NM. Dancers in regalia that was heavy and probably really warm in the desert heat. They danced for hours on end. And they did not call attention to themselves or how wonderful they were or how much smarter they were than anyone else. They just danced. And they shook each others' hands. And they danced and they drummed. Not to make a point or a statement or support some cause. It was to maintain their culture. Young children, teenagers, young adults and elders. All dancing together.

Okay, so those of you who have been reading regularly know that it was not all sunshine and lollipops while I was away. There was the redundant policies that made no sense and took up too much time and took away from providing good patient care. And there were a few too many drunk and dependent Natives on the street. But, all in all, I learned probably as much as I taught. Not everything needs to be fixed now, immediately, or yesterday. It's okay to not be busy constantly, all day, every day. Take pride in what you do, but that also means not announcing it to everyone. I have always been a little skeptical of those who wear their beliefs, concerns, etc on their shirt sleeves. This experience has reinforced that.

The bats are out and flying around now. That means the mosquitoes are out too. I miss my friend Andrew. It was particularly hard to say good bye to him. I miss my quiet little apartment with just me and Otis. I miss going to the dog park where rescue dogs are really rescue dogs: the dog with no front legs that someone truly rescued after witnessing it getting hit by a car. I miss the smell of mutton and fry bread and kneel down bread. But I am glad to be home. Who knows what next summer holds in store????

the last entry from gallup

Well, I have done it. Made it through 3 months of the working in the most dysfunctional clinic I have ever worked in. But I am left feeling very grateful that I was able to have this experience. And now that it is almost time to leave I wish I could stay a little longer. I am making headway and seeing positive change and would like to see it happen for real. But that would require another 5 years, and, although I could live here that long if I had to, I would much rather be home.

Reflecting back this has been a little bit like pregnancy, only backwards. What? you ask. Well for most women the first and third trimesters are much tougher than the middle one. For me, here, the first and last thirds were good, bordering on great, but that middle part really sucked. I do feel, just a little bit, like I was eventually being used by some of the permanent docs to stir things up that they didn't feel comfortable stirring up, and this actually served to make things less pleasant for me because I was constantly being reminded how bad things were there. On the other hand, I can definitely leave Tohatchi Health Clinic knowing that I had a big role in improving things for both the patients and the staff, and that is ultimately satisfying.

Yesterday, the clinic staff gave me a little ovation and had a nice breakfast, complete with Spam, before we started seeing patients. I presented the stained glass piece I have been working on, and it was well received. Of course, I forgot to take a picture of the final piece, but it did turn out nice if I do say so myself. I saw a few final patients and was then sent to Gallup for my final paperwork and sign outs. It was such a typical example of excessive paper work to no obvious purpose I had to laugh. I was sent hither and yon to be told I didn't need to be there, or that I had the wrong paperwork, and eventually the consensus was that I didn't really need to do anything at all except give back my name badge. For that I could have charged 4 hours work, but I didn't, of course.

I did have a few nice conversations with some of the docs there who expressed how happy they were that I had had the guts to stand up to the powers that be and not put policy in front of patient care. They encouraged me to come back and I just might take them up on it. Maybe. After I get a chance to clear my head.

Rich came out to visit last week and we had a great time. He got to do his personal tour of Canyon de Chelly on Friday, then we went to the Totah Festival in Farmington, NM, which was a great combination of Powwow and crafts. We toured the Aztec Ruins (not really Aztec, of course, they just happened to be in Aztec, NM. We got to actually walk through ruins that people lived in over 1000 years ago. Then we took a short walk through the NM badlands, Bista something, which is eerily like a moon scape. We did some work on Bertha too. This is a really nice part of the country to visit and check out. Blue, red, white, and black rocks, ruins from the earliest organized settlements, mountains, of sorts, and some really nice people. But I don't think I would want to live here. I would miss being able to garden and having nice big trees to sit in the shade of.

Tonight we went to the Navajo Nation Fair in Window Rock, AZ. About 30 miles from here. Had my last mutton on fry bread for a good long while. That's probably a good thing. And went to my last powwow for a while. I am still in awe that on a Saturday night there were all these folks, from 3-83, dressed in traditional regalia, dancing for hours on end together. What a beautiful sight. And not one I can share. I decided to put away the camera and soak in the emotion all for myself.

Tomorrow me and Nancy will finish loading up Bertha. We will take Otis to the dog park one last time. And we will begin our journey home.